Book Reviews

Messages from book: How to win friends and Influence people

This book was written by Dale Carnegie (Nov 24, 1888- Nov 1, 1955). There are 30 chapters in the book and each chapter ends with a rule. Here I have listed 30 rules suggested by the book to win friends and influence people. I have copied and pasted it as it is written in the book. Along with rules, I have also listed quotes and lines from the book which I liked extensively.


Rule 1: Don’t raise your voice, improve your argument.

If you are in argument, even if you are right; you know so much that no man can tell you anything. So you are likely ever to know any more than you do now, which is very little.

Rule 2: Never tell the other person, “You’re wrong. “

Any fool can criticize, Condemn and complain – and most fools do.

Rule 3: If you are wrong, admit it.

Many fools don’t.

Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart ♥, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought 💭 could never be yours. – Dale Carnegie

Rule 4: Begin in a friendly way.

A drop of honey 🍯 catches more flies than a gallon of gall. -Lincoln

Rule 5: Get the other person to agree with you immediately.

Rule 6: Let the other person do more of the talking.

In comedy laughter settles all arguments.

Rule 7: Let the other person have ownership of the idea.

Do the hard jobs first. The easy job will take care of themselves.

Rule 8: Try to see things from the others’ point of view.

Do the things you fear to do and keep on doing it… that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear.

Rule 9: Be sympathetic to the other person’s idea and desires.

If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves.

Try new strategies. If you are satisfied with the results you are getting now, why change? If you are not satisfied, why not experiment?

Rule 10: Appeal to the nobler motives.

Rule 11: Dramatize your ideas. 💡

Each nation feels superior to other nations. That breeds patriotism and wars.

Rule 12: Challenges generates excitement.

That is what every successful person loves: the game. The chance of self-expression.

Fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.

Rule 13: Show a genuine interest in other people.

Rule 14: A smile is the best ornament you can wear.

Rule 15: A person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound in any language to him or her.

Remember the name and use it more.

Everybody in the world is seeking happiness -and there is one sure way to find it. Thai is by controlling your thoughts. 💭 Happiness doesn’t depend on outward conditions. It depends on inward conditions.

Rule 16: Be a good listener.

Never give anyone else the responsibility for your life.

Feeling sorry for yourself and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. -Dale Carnegie

Rule 17: Talk in relation to the other person’s interests.

Rule 18: Make the other person feel important.

Give as much courtesy as you can, from your heart. ♥

Prepare to accept the worst. Then proceed to improve on the worst.

Rule 19: Begin with praise.

Rule 20: Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.

Rule 21: Before criticising the other person, talk about your own mistakes.

If you have no critics, you’ll likely have no success.

Rule 22: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.

Rule 23: Let the other person save face.

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. – Martin Luther

If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done.

Rule 24: Praise every improvement.

Rule 25: Give the other person a good reputation to live up to.

Rule 26: Use encouragement. (To help other improve.)

Act enthusiastic and you will be enthusiastic.

Rule 27: Make the other person happy about doing whatever you suggest.

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. 🌸 -Marcel Proust

Rule 28: Don’t condemn, complain or criticize.

Rule 29: Appreciation should be honest, not flattery.

Rule 30: Arouse in the other person a desire for the object.

Look from other person’s point of view and from your own.

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